Valentine’s is never good for my state of mind, regardless of how over it I am intellectually. The simple fact is I feel too much, and have never learned how to properly express those feelings, which leaves me at the same time both insipid and manic. Not a good combination.
Been reading (or rather listening) to an interesting book recently called Attached. This is my first foray into “self-help” and it wasn’t altogether disastrous, although I can’t say that I really have any meaningful courses of action opening up as a result of it. For the record I would appear to be a classical ‘Anxious’, although interestingly, when I look at how I behave I’m pretty sure anyone trying to analyse me would have me down as ‘Avoidant’. The book has an interesting enough premise, and I especially like the take at the end of the film (500) Days of Summer.
So where am I going with this? I’m not sure really. I’m just trying to get my head round the contradiction that the only known ‘secret to the getting the girl’ seems to be confidence, which for some reason I utterly lack. And me expressing that thought just makes me look….well……unconfident.
The frustrating part is I *do* have an inherent sense of self-worth. I just don’t seem to know how to project it. This post doesn’t help!
Publish and be damned, indeed!